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Thursday, April 20, 2023

Understanding The Dones

If you google "church dones," you will find multiple articles trying to understand these people and perhaps lure them back into church again. I will add my thoughts to the list, for I also was a done a few times in the last ten years. Remember that "dones" is a term that carries different definitions depending on who's talking. What follows is my perspective. Please stop here if you don't want to read anything challenging about the church.


What is a done? A done is a person who usually values their relationship with God and religious beliefs quite highly yet is done with the church as they know it. (Those who forsake the church because they have left God are not who we are discussing when discussing dones.) Hence the term "done." The dones aren't necessarily anti-church. Some are. Most believe that the existing construct we call church isn't cutting it. So dones can usually be found in two different places on Sunday mornings, In their homes alone or in a church with some non-denominational bent. In short, a done is done with the church as it is, but in love with God and wanting the church as intended. 


What creates the done? For it to happen, the person has to reach a place where they are willing to risk having no church family rather than their current situation. Hebrews 10:25 leads us to conclude that being churchless is not good, so there is no excuse for doing so out of minor offense or lack of motivation. The enemy of our souls wants to isolate us, so at times, we may have to fight uphill to come together, but it's worth it. Yet, I would say the church carries some blame for creating the temptation to be done. What does the church do to cause people to feel like leaving? In my view, it's simply impure religion.


Religion is defined as being a belief in and worship of supernatural power. Pure religion towards God is a beautiful thing. (See James 1:27.) Problem is, if we are honest, most of us have an impure religion. What's the difference? Purity is the absence of anything that corrupts. Impure religion toward God is when we mix the teachings of the New Testament with teachings from our culture or heritage. I believe most sincere dones are trying to discover or restore that pure religion in their lives. Staying is hard when the church they grew up in propagates an impure religion. Let's make that practical with two examples that impact me personally. 


Protestant Bible Churches contain many sincere believers, yet there is a disturbing trend amongst the ones in America. What is that trend? When the gospel of the Kingdom and American culture disagree, the protestant church will take the Republican party position. For example, remarriage after divorce the Republican party is ok with it, but the Kingdom of God is not. (Matthew 5:32) When praying, according to conservative elements of culture, to honor God, both genders should not wear any head-covering. So it is at all the Nascar races that the announcer says, "Ladies and gentlemen, please rise and remove your hats as pastor so and so gives today's invocation." However, according to the Kingdom of God, if you want to honor God's headship, it varies by gender. (1 Corinthians 11:4-5)

If America has an enemy, many conservative churches take the Republican position and honor their boys to go and kill these enemies of our freedom. Yet, the Kingdom of God has a different approach. (Matthew 5:38-44) The protestant church today has a mixture of Kingdom and Republican values. Is it any wonder that a protestant who wants to take all of Jesus' teachings seriously and literally might be tempted to become a done?


Mennonite Churches contain many sincere believers, yet there is a disturbing trend amongst the ones in America. What is that trend? Why, it's simply a matter of heritage. Suppose there is a disagreement between the Mennonite heritage and the Kingdom of God. In that case, if there is a disagreement between the two regarding whether a new believer can be part of the Kingdom of God or function in his calling, many Mennonite churches will agree with their heritage instead. Some examples are baptism and communion; Mennonites seem too eager to withhold these things from fellow believers based on heritage. What if someone is not going to be a member of your church and, therefore, will not adhere to your church standard? Why not baptize him on his confession of faith? In the case of communion, will you serve it to any believer or just members of your group willing to dress precisely according to the specifications outlined in your church standard? I am asking questions here, for I do not see the Mennonite churches sweeping away clear teachings from the New Testament as much as I would see them adding to it. In short, to be a sincere disciple of Christ, follow the New Testament's teachings, confess Christ, receive his spirit, learn to live like him, etc., but to be a good Mennonite and disciple of Christ at the same time, add to this a willingness to adhere to the specific application of heritage as outlined by your particular church denomination. Then hope and pray your free, Spirit-filled life in Christ can survive this application of heritage.  


Do the dones have it together, then? Nope, not a chance! Dones are infested with the same impure religious problems as the group they came from. The only difference is that the dones decided to go on a journey of purification. This journey led them to leave the church that was attempting to impose these impurities on them. If you are a done, please hear this message: It feels like you are at a crossroads. On the right is forsaking the assembly, but purity; on the left is assembly with the believers but with impurity. This crossroads is fictional. Pick up your phone, invite friends for a meal, serve them communion, pray together, and repeat. Visit other churches; you can fellowship without being immersed in it. Seek accountability, for we all have heresies within us that we have not yet discovered. As you do these things and continue your walk with Christ, you will realize that you are back in a church community again and, therefore, not such a done after all. 


What about the happy church people? I'm glad you're happy. Try to have a little sympathy for the dones. It may be that they cannot walk towards purity and chew the bad gum of false religion simultaneously as you can. As we all work toward Christ faithfully in his walk for us, we will all come together someday. Or perhaps you have walked this road and are now settled in a church community that shares your heart for purity. I'm so happy for you! Pray for those who are behind you and going through what you did. 


Biblical Blueprintism is something that some dones resort to. This homemade expression is the idea that the problem with churches is in "the how" and not in the religion. By "the how," I'm talking about the service; it's the belief that sitting in a circle in someone's living room like "they did in Acts" will solve the problem. I enjoy these gatherings and have no issue with such a church if that's how someone feels led to meet, but changing the environment alone does not resolve the issue. I sincerely believe the solution lies in applying the gospel Jesus taught to our lives. For example, Jesus' sermon on the Mount takes up just about 3 of Matthew's 28 chapters. Yet most of us still need to lay hold of the first sentence of it. "Blessed are the poor in Spirit...." What does that mean? How do I become that? What is my Spirit? If we all embraced, learned, and obeyed Jesus' gospel as he taught it and not just the part about what he did (healing us, dying for us), I suspect he would gladly show us how to meet for our time and place. Doing this would render the dones, as I have described them, an extinct species and make this entire writeup pointless. 

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